In The Moment…
I just wanted to be in the moment with everyone else. I wanted to be in their moment of happiness. I wanted to be in their moment of success. I wanted to be in their moment of victory. I truly wanted to be in their moment to celebrate with them as a brother is supposed to do, right? “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.” (Hebrews 10:24, NIV). I felt I was being in the moment. I felt I had good intentions. I feel my heart being checked…
There was a moment all I wanted to do was be in the moment with everyone. I wanted to turn down my volume, I wanted to shut my mouth more and listen more. I know I have the gift of gab and who doesn’t like talking about themselves, but it was time for me to be in the moment. To be in the moment of silence. I began to shut my mouth more not out of fear of saying the wrong things, but in an attempt to be more attentive. I wanted to be more engaged, more there, more in the moment. I feel my heart being checked…
Conversation after conversation, meeting after meeting, silence after silence. As I focused more on the positive vibes of being able to be more in the moment the more I felt engaged, more there, more in the moment. This wonderful excitement of being able to be in the moment with everyone. Conversations became more meaningful, meetings started to have better outcomes. This feeling that I feel is amazing, but how long will this feeling last? I am in the moment but am I here for these feelings or here for Us, the We. I feel my heart being checked…
I desired to be more engaged, more in the moment with those around me. But I only completed half of the puzzle by only shutting my mouth. I forgot to also put away my own selfish thoughts, my opinions. You know those thoughts that no matter what research is presented to you there are these thoughts based off our own experience and/or interpretations. See, I felt that if I shut my mouth more, I will be more in the moment, more engaged. All I was doing was fulfilling this appearance that appeared to be right in sight. While on the inside I was listening to respond while focusing on appearing to be listening. It’s hard to be in the moment when there are all these mental tasks being completed. I feel my heart being checked…
I knew that if I truly wanted to be more engaged in conversations, in meetings, I would have to go completely silent. We only know what we know and there are moments when we get to learn more. We get to see the same problem presented to us but told in a different story that provides us with a new perspective, a new thought, a new addition to our mind. I knew that to truly be in the moment I had to turn my “selfish” brain down. I had to silence those opinions, those experiences only I had in thought, and be in the moment. It wasn’t enough just closing my mouth and being silent in noise, but I had to complete the circle to be fully engaged. I also had to silence those silent thoughts, those silent opinions. My heart was being checked…
